Did you know that Americans love failure? Really, we do.
But only as the backdrop to success.
The people we hold up in high regard in this country are those who pulled themselves up by their own bootstraps out of terrible adversity and now have the money, the career, the happy family... those are our success stories. Rags to riches, ash piles to gold piles. Honestly I do not think that there is anything wrong with a good success story. Kinda gives me hope.
But what about just plain, painful, smacks-you-in-the-face failure? I'm sure you know what I'm talking about. Those times in your life when you try to accomplish something and it ends horribly, like by epic proportions. And it's so bad that you really can't do anything but stick the mangled idea in the corner, hope you forget about it and that over time the stinging red mark left by your colossal belly flop won't hurt so much. Sometimes you just can't redeem certain things.
Usually, however, you can at least move forward. I've heard many people say that you're only a failure if you quit. Well, does that statement account for changing directions? Some might consider the fact that I decided not to keep pursuing graphic design after I was laid off as me having failed in the art field. The truth of the matter is that I'm being Icelandic about it.
Did you know that Iceland is considered to be one of the happiest places in the world? Seriously. A study was done about it recently. It's hard to believe considering that they live in darkness for half the year (sun doesn't come up in the winter time). It could be because they all drink a ton on the weekends (but if you touch even half a glass of Merlot during the week you're a lush), but I think it has a lot more to do with their typically close knit communities and a sense that it's perfectly acceptable to fail... and then not have to redeem it. It is unusual there for a person to have just one career all their life. People reinvent themselves many times over their lives, even well into their later years.
There is an old, extremely campy song that goes, "when you fall down, pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start all over again". The song is entirely too cheerful for the subject matter, especially because each time you fall down it gets harder and harder to get up. And after awhile your strength runs out.
Alex and I both have been feeling pretty exhausted lately. But I can say that God has been teaching us some truths during this time. Mostly that we don't have control over anything in our lives (not even our thoughts or speech) despite our best efforts, and that eventually our own strength isn't enough to get us through. Right now, we both just want to take a break (although it took me much more longer than him to admit that... God in His wisdom saw fit to not have me marry another energizer bunny; thanks God!). Alex put it perfectly. He said that the best thing for us to do right now is to rest in God's strength and wait on Him.
I'm an independent person. I was raised to take care of myself and figure things out on my own. I'm thankful for that, but it gets me in trouble from time to time. Mostly it makes me pushy. I gotta wonder if God is ever amused by me trying to bully Him. I know Alex isn't when I try to bully him. Resting and waiting is not something I'm very good at. I do like to pick myself up, dust myself off and start over again. And I like to do it RIGHT NOW.
But another song also plays in my ear:
In Christ alone my hope is found
He is my light, my strength, my song
This cornerstone, this solid ground
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm
What heights of love, what depths of peace
When fears are still, when strivings cease
My comforter, my all in all
Here in the love of Christ I stand
I'm not very good at waiting. But God's word is full of instruction to do so. And God knows I'm not very good, so I don't at all find it surprising that this verse in Psalm 37 just came to my attention:
Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways.
Pass the jumbo bandaids, please.
No comments:
Post a Comment